Duck Duck Cougar?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
