Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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