someone get that fucking seahorse.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
