Dual....:-)
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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