I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize
