as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I just found puke in my bra..
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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