I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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