And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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