is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
