I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
