If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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