I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
