he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
