The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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