i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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