i just wanna soil my oats bro
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
