you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
