Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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