You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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