theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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