VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
