youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
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