You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
