Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
