we're chasing vodka with high fives
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
