All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
