im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Still dying that you shit outside
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I currently don't understand fingers.
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