so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
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