yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
