How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Bring me that man meat
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
