I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize