Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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