The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you inspire me to be a worse person
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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