I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
