Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize