He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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