Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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