i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
