Texts From Last Night

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  Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies

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  (+02): Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies http://tfl.nu/80zn
  Replies (15) Good night (2721) Bad night (517)
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  (418): View more from Quebec

  I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.

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  (418): I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach. http://tfl.nu/7gys
  Replies (15) Good night (6812) Bad night (894)
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  (650): View more from California

  We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.

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  (650): We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you. http://tfl.nu/6i0s
  Replies (19) Good night (4990) Bad night (1025)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.

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  (702): I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad. http://tfl.nu/4uh2
  Replies (16) Good night (4899) Bad night (1439)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.

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  (412): My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me. http://tfl.nu/dzz5
  Replies (40) Good night (864) Bad night (7638)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..

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  (+44): The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her.. http://tfl.nu/uw6o
  Replies (5) Good night (2180) Bad night (651)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  As shirtless as possible

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  (505): As shirtless as possible http://tfl.nu/35li
  Replies (3) Good night (1555) Bad night (459)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.

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  (614): My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet. http://tfl.nu/omff
  Replies (11) Good night (811) Bad night (1799)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.

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  (206): I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night. http://tfl.nu/kkxt
  Replies (4) Good night (1660) Bad night (569)
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  (283): View more from Ohio

  He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.

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  (283): He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought. http://tfl.nu/hl8d
  Replies (3) Good night (1776) Bad night (565)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  He used a "food city great value" card to cut it

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  (267): he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli (267): He used a "food city great value" card to cut it http://tfl.nu/fxwe
  Replies (2) Good night (350) Bad night (630)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.

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  (405): All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head. http://tfl.nu/p2id
  Replies (2) Good night (503) Bad night (241)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"

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  (713): No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY" http://tfl.nu/to54
  Replies (5) Good night (728) Bad night (478)
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  (718): View more from New York

  Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.

  (646): View more from New York

  You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.

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  (718): Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well. (646): You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response. http://tfl.nu/j3cp
  Replies (2) Good night (392) Bad night (269)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?

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  (803): Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right? http://tfl.nu/7twp
  Replies (7) Good night (212) Bad night (891)

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