Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Randomize
