i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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