I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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