I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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