Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
