try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
We need to rekindle our bromance
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Actions speak louder than pants.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
My lighter is stuck in my beard.