Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.