god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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