Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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