good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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