i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
