You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
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