It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
